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In Remembrance....

7/9/2014

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Anniversaries are meant to be for celebrations--aren't they?
How do you "celebrate" a life-threatening, life-changing event?
Today marks the 2-year anniversary of the first of three major surgeries in 3 1/2 weeks that I went through. It reminds me of the time I spent 14 days straight in the hospital and went through the most excruciating pain I've ever felt.

I try to use this day as a catalyst and a point of encouragement--a positive thing. I tell myself that focusing on the negative and the "bad" memories aren't productive and instead will only lead to despair and depression. After all, it's important to always look on the bright side and keep moving forward, right?

My emergence from this ordeal has strengthened me tremendously. It was caused me to understand things about myself that I never would have learned otherwise. Because of this I have embarked upon a journey of "release" and "living boldly" in order to "think bigger" and be better. I used this event as fuel to a never-ending fire and drive into "beast mode". I harnessed my resurgence and turned it into books, speaking topics, strategy sessions and countless "Note 2 Self" entries. 

My "anniversary"; my "celebration"--this 2-year mark that I am reminded of everyday as I look at the scars on my body--is done in solemn remembrance of who I was and who I became on the other side of the journey.

So when you can understand that the things that happened to you and because of you are all necessary and that your life's journey is made up of mountains AND valleys--then you can truly embrace the process of living and become "Released and Ready" to truly Live Boldly and "Think Bigger" as you move ever--forward.
How Do You Remember?
A Poem

How do you remember the "not so good" times?
How do you give homage to the events of your past?
How do you quiet the voices and escape the shadows?
How do you make the moment last?

How do you embrace what's new, without discarding the old?
How do you strive to reach the top, without feeling you've sold your soul?

How do you encapsulate a lifetime of experiences---into a single moment in time?
How do you stand apart from everyone you've encountered--and try to make your light shine?

How do you learn all of the countless lessons, that life always tries to teach?
How do you constantly keep striving for goals, that seem always just out of your reach?

How do you remember who you are, when life tries to beat you down?
Just remember the essence of your true self, and envision upon your head a crown.

There will always be things that cause you pain, but remember, they enable growth too--
Because if it weren't for the experiences that you've encountered, then you actually wouldn't be YOU.

(c) 2014 ~KARS
1 Comment

Released and Ready: Make Decisions NOT Choices

10/10/2013

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When was the last time you made a DECISION?

I know what you’re saying—“Keisha, I make decisions all the time.”

No, I mean real decisions.  What most of us do in our daily lives is make choices.   Choices consist of selecting from options that are presented before us—this or that or the other.   When you make a choice, you’re ultimately not responsible for the outcomes because it really wasn’t your decision.  You just had to choose from the options that were presented before you.  There wasn’t much thought given to what happens after you make the choice.  Usually you make the choice and then move on from there.  At the next crossroads, you make another choice, and so on.

 How many times do you hear people say “But I didn’t have a choice” when encountered with a difficult situation?  (You usually hear this when they did something that caused someone else a great deal of pain or inconvenience.)

Choices are external.  The control is not yours. 

The outcomes from choices are predetermined based on the options that are presented.  You are simply choosing which of the outcomes you prefer to deal with—or not deal with—as the case may be. 

When people make choices, they seldom accept responsibility for any of the outcomes that come with them for the simple fact that they weren’t involved in making the decision that led up to the choice.

Even when you say the words “I choose”, you don’t feel in control.  You feel as if there’s still some doubt—as if the other option still might be better. 

Think about it.  When a waiter asks you what you’re having, and you say “I think I’ll choose the fish.”Do you sound certain about that?  Is that your final answer?  

Or when you tell someone that you’ve “chosen to start your own business” or “chosen to go back to school” or even that you’ve “chosen to take the day off”, do you find that they question you? 

The problem isn’t that you’re not respected.   The problem is in your choice of words and actions. 

You’re making choices when you should be making decisions. 

Now, decisions, on the other hand, are by their very nature concrete.  They bring with them a feeling of being in control; of finality of someone who knows what they want and will not be questioned or second-guessed.

Making decisions implies that you have weighed all of the possible outcomes; examined the situation from all angles; understand all of the variables involved and that you come to the best conclusion possible and determined that this is the course of action that you will take as a result.

Making decisions implies taking responsibility for the outcomes.

Making decisions implies that you are in control.

Making decisions implies that you are not to be questioned, because there is no doubt and nothing left to be explored.

Making decisions is proactive way of controlling your life, while making choices is reaction to circumstances.

Now, repeat the same scenario from before, this time make some decisions instead of choices.

When a waiter asks you what you’re having, and you say “I have decided to have the fish.”  How do you feel as a result?  What do you believe the impression is this time as opposed to before?

Or when you tell someone that you’ve “decided to start your own business” or “decided to go back to school” or even that you’ve “decided to take the day off”, do you find that they question you now?

It’s the same, yet incredibly different.

The first step to becoming Released and Ready is to make a decision—not a choice.  You must make a decision to be different.  You have to decide to find those things that fuel your passion; align with your purpose and build your legacy.  You have to decide that you are committed to be what you need to become in order release all that you are and are meant to be.

The first step to being Released and Ready is to make a decision.

Are you ready?

Decide.
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    Keisha A. Rivers Shorty, Strategist, Consultant, Speaker and Author.  

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